Iraqis angry that U.S. forgot anniversary of war
Iraqi citizens, already furious at the United States for a host of issues, are now miffed that the U.S. apparently forgot the third anniversary of the war there, sources said today.
Across the war-torn nation, Iraqis expressed a range of emotions from dismay to outright anger at the U.S. for failing to recognize the anniversary of the March 2003 invasion.
And while Sunnis and Shiites have found little to agree about as sectarian violence has surged in recent weeks, they both seemed in accord about one thing today: the United States should have at least sent flowers.
“A third anniversary is a big deal, and it should have been marked with a tasteful bouquet,” said Tikrit resident Hassan El-Medfaai, 47. “Apparently, this anniversary means a lot more to us than it does to them.”
At the White House, aides were scrambling to make amends with the Iraqi people over the apparent omission, with President Bush reportedly suggesting that the U.S. send a Mylar balloon with the words “Mission Accomplished” on it.
But at the Pentagon, Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld defended the U.S.’s failure to recognize the anniversary, telling reporters, “When we invaded three years ago, the Iraqis didn’t greet us with flowers, either.”
Secretary Rumsfeld added that a third anniversary is not “a major one,” and that the U.S. would still be in Iraq to celebrate the twenty-fifth.
Elsewhere, after Belarussian President Alexander Lukashenko called President Bush “terrorist No. 1 on the planet,” Osama bin Laden said that the ranking should be determined by a tournament and demanded that he be included in the Final Four.
Satire by The Borowitz Report
Across the war-torn nation, Iraqis expressed a range of emotions from dismay to outright anger at the U.S. for failing to recognize the anniversary of the March 2003 invasion.
And while Sunnis and Shiites have found little to agree about as sectarian violence has surged in recent weeks, they both seemed in accord about one thing today: the United States should have at least sent flowers.
“A third anniversary is a big deal, and it should have been marked with a tasteful bouquet,” said Tikrit resident Hassan El-Medfaai, 47. “Apparently, this anniversary means a lot more to us than it does to them.”
At the White House, aides were scrambling to make amends with the Iraqi people over the apparent omission, with President Bush reportedly suggesting that the U.S. send a Mylar balloon with the words “Mission Accomplished” on it.
But at the Pentagon, Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld defended the U.S.’s failure to recognize the anniversary, telling reporters, “When we invaded three years ago, the Iraqis didn’t greet us with flowers, either.”
Secretary Rumsfeld added that a third anniversary is not “a major one,” and that the U.S. would still be in Iraq to celebrate the twenty-fifth.
Elsewhere, after Belarussian President Alexander Lukashenko called President Bush “terrorist No. 1 on the planet,” Osama bin Laden said that the ranking should be determined by a tournament and demanded that he be included in the Final Four.
Satire by The Borowitz Report
posted by JoeFriday at 2:40 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home