Make $75,000 a year as a professional leech.

Starting her career as an unwed and unemployed mother in Madison, Wisconsin, Elizabeth Johnson has found the secret to a very stable and lucrative lifestyle. Become a social parasite. Elizabeth, who now lives in Ashland, Oregon, has teamed up with her 'partner', Jason Pancoast, and with the help of their three children ranging in age from 6 years to 3 months old, have turned the art of preying on people's conscience and a desire to help the unfortunate into a business that pays better than $75,000 a year.

The couple, who share a background of broken homes, quickly bonded on one of their first dates, which was a canoeing trip enhanced by LSD.

When asked recently why they don't put in any effort to become respectable contributing members of society, their flippant excuses were that no one would hire them as they haven't had a real job in 8 years. Also, having to be accountable to an employer would take away time they spend on the streets with their kids. These being the same children that are used in their rouse to procure an income almost double the national average.

So you see.. it's for the children.